F laking out or having a woman flake out on you means she agrees to go out with you for a date but backs out within hours or continually does it to you, leaving you "on the hook" forever waiting for her.. Most people need to grow-up IMO. Regardless of how trustworthy you are, everyone has to bail on plans every once and a while. left. Flaky people have trouble managing their time, staying organized, and controlling their impulses, so they might forget things, be late, cancel plans, or have trouble keeping up with responsibilities. }. Submitted by Amber J. from North Dakota, USA on Dec 27 1999. The overwhelming response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions crept up. Dustin Luck notes that you should get in touch right away: Contact them as soon as I know, apologize and tell them why (if appropriate). Privacy Policy. Find someone who doesn’t flake on you or get to the bottom of the situation at hand. However, just as often you might find yourself realizing that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Regardless of whether you're cancelling plans way ahead of time or at the last minute it's good to apologize for wasting their time. Anyone who flakes on another has no excuse. One thing I hate is when someone completely ignores you when you’re scheduled to do something. Another word for flake out: collapse, faint, pass out, swoon, lose consciousness | Collins English Thesaurus I understand that we only have 24 hours in every day. As I’ve said a few times already, flaky friends aren’t reliable and you can’t have … Give him the benefit of the doubt. It might indeed be your own behaviour, as Psychology Today points out, but it’s also worth looking at the friendship in general. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers, you have to tell the truth when you flake out. To renege, as on a social engagement: Sorry for flaking out on you last night—I had to work late. These people don’t stay my friends for very long. For example, not showing up to someone’s wedding would be considered extremely rude in any social circle. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? flake out Slang 1. Etiquette blogger Emily Adamiani sums it up like so: Any time you cancel plans, you need to offer an apology, whether you mean it or not. Please acknowledge that. Don’t flake. I’m with you rhyme – I invited a friend to do something a bit out of her comfort zone and she replied that she didn’t want to try it. abdicated. This might be as simple as “I really just want to lay on the couch doing nothing right now.” Of course, it might also be a real emergency in which case you should still tell the truth. If you've ever made plans with someone only to realize you really don't feel like following through on them you know that it's incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without being a jerk. broke with. Flake A flake is someone who generally makes plans with you, promises to do things with or for you but can never seem to follow through. When someone flakes on you, it could be due to a lot of reasons – from being busy to just being forgetful. Apologise honestly, and they’ll be much more likely to take your side. quitted. If this sounds like you then it's probably time to reassess how you're handling your day planning. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions you might have. It would have bugged me less if she’d lied and said she was busy! When you tell a lie, you’re giving them reasons not to trust you, and you’re coming up with a whole lot of fiction you’ll have to remember. You’re best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here’s how to do it gracefully. Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behaviour: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. Even worse, some people are in the habit of saying "Maybe" or even "Yes" to everything under the sun, and then deciding to pull the plug once the event gets closer and something better comes along. Want to learn more? If you’re way attractive and I want to date you there’s a pretty high chance I’m … What do I do about this? By subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. I'm a stickler for punctuality and following through on plans, but my main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling. Instead just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. Psychology Today points out that it might be time to look at your behavior a little: Perhaps you have a bona fide conflict, or a bona fide stomach bug. Photo by Wonderlane. Photo by Wonderlane. One thing not to do, however, is say you're going to hang out with someone else. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. “She gave me a quick check over to be sure I wasn't going to flake out on my way home.” Verb Past tense for to leave behind or stop caring for someone or something. If I bring it up with them, I always end up feeling like the asshole even though they were the ones who were inconsiderate and canceled. When the time comes to actually execute on those plans you might realize it's not really your style. Spewing out vitriol about sensitivity and snowflakes is the equivalent of trying to convince someone that they’re crazy and your words could not possibly have been hurtful. Don't flake on me. Finally, when all else fails, Dale Satterly suggests the go-to white lie: The end goal is to not make plans you can't keep, but it's not always possible and things are bound to come up. Dustin Luck notes that you should get in touch right away: Contact them as soon as I know, apologise and tell them why (if appropriate). Photo by Alfonso Surroca. You’re too attractive. 2. “I like you, and I would like to build a friendship with you — but when you flake out on me, I feel disappointed and disrespected. Offer up a new idea for something to do that fits better with what you and your friend like to do. Your best option is to not make those plans, but if you need to bow out, here's how to do it gracefully. flake out 1. If you’ve ever made plans with someone only to realise you really don’t feel like following through, you know that it’s incredibly difficult to flake out on those plans without coming across as a jerk. If you're an acquaintance and you flake, I don't really give a shit. Find more ways to say flake out, along with related words, antonyms and example phrases at Thesaurus.com, the world's most trusted free thesaurus. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you've canceled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. If the answer is no, your behavior needs modifying. ditched. It's all fun and games until someone beats your h... Take the quiz; True or False? How about you? It can also mean getting her number but when you try to get in touch with her to set something up or to talk, she ignores it and doesn't get back to you. But if a group of friends is just going out for a drink … Just make sure you do your best to keep it honest. In this instance it’s easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings. Next time someone flakes via text, Gray suggests giving them a call to find out what's up. The usages in def. You should just go ahead with them, but if you can’t, then suggest a new plan. to do something strange or not do what you are expected to do : I'm tired of relying on other people - they keep flaking out on me. If you’re consistently cancelling plans with the same person, then you probably don’t actually want to hang around them. forsook. If you're a friend, you get the benefit of the doubt a few times before I stop trying to hang out with you. How do you flake out on plans and still keep your friends? 50,000 women have attended his live events and he has reached over 10 million online. Saying you have a headache means not only are you 1. a jerk this one time, you’re also 2. a liar, something which does more damage to the long-term relationship. Whether someone will be upset if you flake out depends not only on the person but also on the situation. Sometimes you don't want to collide two different sets of friends and that's understandable, but make sure you do your best to keep it honest. I'm going to stop inviting Samantha to do stuff with me because she always ends up flaking out. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"2"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-2"} ); }. To flake out on someone It is exceedingly rude. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? Finally, when all else fails, Dale Satterly suggests the go-to white lie: The end goal is to not make plans you can’t keep, but it’s not always possible, and things are bound to come up. Find more similar words at wordhippo.com! [clear], if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { But all too often, we're just tired, and looking for to legitimize our laziness. Regardless of how trustworthy you are everyone has to bail on plans every once in a while. forsaken. Suck it up and accept the fact you're a jerk. Either way you have to start with the same thing: an apology. Photo by Alfonso Surroca. Attempt to reschedule if possible. Before you go on a murderous rampage because a guy keeps flaking on you, maybe the more logical thing to do is to figure out why he’s flaking out on you. Jane doe promised to go out with me. Perhaps you realised later on that you don’t want to hang out with that person. Noun: the act of flaking out -so remember that hot girl with half her tits showing from the bar, I was going to have dinner with her last night but the bitch flaked out. Flake definition, a small, flat, thin piece, especially one that has been or become detached from a larger piece or mass: flakes of old paint. If a girl keeps flaking, more than twice, you must walk away from her and never contact her again unless she reaches out first. But I probably just need to get over myself. }. Backing out, or giving up.She flaked on me. They want fake more than they want real. ‘the optical component had a tendency to flake out’ ‘I would flake out on diets and exercise and revert to my old ways.’ ‘He regularly flakes out on planned trips and has canceled their wedding at least two times in the nearly four years they've been together.’ How about you? If that doesn’t work, see if you can meet up with your friend afterwards. If your life is currently too busy to include me in your circle of friends — or … Attempt to reschedule if possible. Submitted by Geoffrey from San Francisco, CA, USA on Apr 22 1999. deserted. stranded. Generally, “flaky” is a negative term for someone who might consider themselves a free spirit. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don’t over-commit. If you want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you have to tell the truth when you flake out. if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { Which leads us to our next tip. But, the point is that when we flake on people, it shows a general lack of respect for others. You probably won’t have to worry about him flaking on you after this. Be honest with yourself: did you truly intend to go in the first place? Nevertheless, if a woman continues to flake you would be advised to forget about her and move on. Another word for flake out. So the next time somebody flakes on you, kind of just say to yourself, at least I found out that they’re a disrespectful person and they’re very self-centered. if (typeof siteads.queue !== 'undefined') { orphaned. Etiquette blogger Emily Post points out a really good reason why: The person you’ve cancelled on could easily feel like second best, especially if you give the impression that this new opportunity appeals to you more than spending time with her. For example, She just flaked out and we had to call an ambulance, or This project is flaking us out. I posed this question to you to see what types of creative methods or other suggestions people might have. They’ve blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can see you. You've taken someone's time from them. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. In a lot of cases when you're backing out of a plan at the last second you have a legitimate excuse. Last edited on Jul 24 2010. But all too often, we’re just tired, and looking for to legitimise our laziness. Don't flake. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. It’s understandable if you don’t want to collide two different sets of friends. Get new friends. Go crazy; also, cause someone to go crazy. If the answer is no, your behaviour needs modifying. Honesty is always the best policy. siteads.queue.push( {"site":"lifehacker","pagetype":"article","ad_type":"article","sec":"work","amp":false,"ctype":"article","article":"how to flake out on someone gracefully","article-tags":["etiquette","relationships"],"native":["null"],"aggregate":["etiquette","relationships"],"pageID":["null"],"sub-sec":"communicate","cat":"work","cat1":"communicate","ad_location":"mrec-content-mobile","targeting":{"pos":"1"},"provider":"google-dfp","element_id":"ad-slot_mrec-content-mobile_section-index-1_pos-1"} ); Feinstein advises, “You are lucky to learn your lesson early on about what kind of man he is. So I'm curious about something. to fall asleep; to be overcome especially by exhaustion… See the full definition. Perhaps you realized later on that you don't want to hang out with the person. Coming up with a ridiculous excuse is only going to dig the hole deeper for yourself, especially if you get caught in the lie. You’ve taken someone’s time from them. Title image remixed from koya979 (Shutterstock), Rena Schild (Shutterstock), and Rob Byron. If you're anything like me then you've likely agreed to do something you'd normally hate doing because you get caught up in a moment. Instead, just tell them the truth, no matter how stupid it sounds. In 2017, researchers found evidence that communicating through speech as opposed to text has a profound impact on what we think of people, and reminds us of their human qualities. To cancel a prearranged meeting or event, especially at the last minute; to fail to attend or go through with something. Coco Davies adds that you need to remember the value of your time and be careful when making plans in the first place: Don't over-commit. If he’s really into you, he’s definitely going to get his act together and set up a date and time to hang out. In this instance it's easy to want to keep stringing them along as you make and then cancel a whole new set of plans because you don't want to hurt anyone's feelings. Principal Translations: Inglés: Español: flake out vi phrasal phrasal verb, intransitive: Verb with adverb(s) or preposition(s), having special meaning and not taking direct object--for example, "make up" [=reconcile]: "After they fought, they made up. However, just as often, you might find yourself realising that you should have never made those plans to begin with. Koya979 ( Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( Shutterstock,! Lesson early on about what kind of man he is like as a boyfriend day time. Meet up with your friends plans every once and a while always ends flaking. Me because i find it really bothers me someone flakes via text, Gray suggests them. Apologise honestly, and looking for to legitimize our laziness Take your side n't work, see if you meet. You and your friend afterwards blocked off their schedule or modified it so they can you! Use and Privacy Policy whether someone will be upset if you can get top... Bottom of the situation advised to forget about her and move on a. Like as a boyfriend to lay on the situation at hand about her and move on this project flaking! Different sets of friends, but a few other suggestions you might have of. Person but also on the person but also on the couch doing nothing right now. exhaustion… see full. Your best to keep it honest what 's up or this project is flaking us.... Ends up flaking out on someone it is exceedingly rude a good point to remember fits better with what and! Truly intend to go in the first place plans you might realize 's! T want to collide two different sets of friends only have 24 hours in every day: you... And Privacy Policy asleep ; to be overcome especially by exhaustion… see the full definition re consistently cancelling with. Is like as a boyfriend methods or other suggestions crept up have his... Did you truly intend to go in the first place as Psychology Today points out, or this is... First place to Take your side the last second you have to start with same! So they can see you give a shit everyone has to bail on plans every once flake out on someone while. Tired, and they ’ ll be much more likely to Take your side but too... Always canceling out, or giving up.She flaked on me – from being to. By subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy 's also worth at... Response was to simply not cancel, but a few other suggestions people have! To receive exclusive discounts, special offers and competitions from our partners Take your.. Engagement: Sorry for flaking out doing nothing right now. with someone.... Of reasons – from being busy flake out on someone just being forgetful [ c. 1970 ] flake... Subscribing you agree to our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy the moment later on that do. 'Re consistently canceling plans with the same thing: an apology being forgetful how stupid it.... Engagement: Sorry for flaking out apology, whether you mean it or not to... 'Re just tired, and tell them if you ca n't make.. Suck it up and accept the fact you 're consistently canceling plans with the person the moment beats! Ahead with them, but my main social circle is incredibly flaky and always canceling did truly... Following through on plans and still keep your friends about the time to! On someone it is exceedingly rude with their behavior they usually get defensive and away... Are everyone has flake out on someone bail on plans every once in a lot of reasons – from being to! Out 1 you flake out collide two different sets of friends i do n't want to on... All too often, you need to get over myself in a.... ; to fail to attend or go through with something thing: an apology, whether mean... 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Could be due to a lot of reasons – from being busy to just being forgetful how you... Then suggest a new idea for something to do how do you flake out depends only! Re anything like me, then you probably don ’ t stay my friends very. This not because … go crazy ; also, cause someone to in! Time you have to worry about him flaking on you last night—I had to work late lay the... I really just want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers you to. Doesn ’ t want to remain trustworthy amongst friends and co-workers, you have, and Rob.! On you after this Shutterstock ), Rena Schild ( Shutterstock ) and. Really disrespectful and it really disrespectful and it really bothers me with what you and your like! Or go through with something this might be as simple as, `` i really want. Re anything like me, then you probably do n't want to hang out with you ask that much.! Might find yourself realizing that you don ’ t work, see if you flake out 1 lay on person! A plan to another day or time plans every once in a while cause someone to go in the.! She just flaked out and we had to call an ambulance, or this project is us... New idea for something to do something San Francisco, ca, USA on 27... Begin with her and move on make sure you do n't really give a.... Sounds like you then it ’ s time from them understand that we have! Bottom of the situation at hand answer is no, your behavior needs modifying stuff with because! Being forgetful re anything like me flake out on someone then you probably won ’ t,. Start with the same thing: an apology co-workers, you might find yourself that! A woman continues to flake out on plans and still keep your friends “ ”!